🎙️ Podcast #15｜Why Do We Love? | 我们为何爱？| Chinese Listening Practice Practice
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大家好，欢迎来到我们的中文学习频道。
Hello everyone, welcome to our Chinese learning channel.
我是你们的中文好朋友！
I am your good Chinese friend!
今天我们来聊一个非常特别、也非常温暖的主题——你知道是什么吗？
Today we are going to talk about a very special and very warm topic - do you know what it is?
就是“为什么我们会爱？
It's "Why do we love?
”也许你正在谈恋爱，也许你曾经心动过某个人，或者你曾因为爱而流过眼泪。
"Maybe you are in love, maybe you have had a crush on someone, or maybe you have shed tears because of love.
无论你是谁、在哪里，说到“爱”，我们心里都会轻轻地震动一下，对吧？
No matter who you are or where you are, when we talk about the word "love", our hearts will vibrate slightly, right?
爱，不只是电影里的浪漫，不只是情人之间的甜言蜜语，
Love is not just the romance in the movies, nor is it just the sweet words between lovers.
它是一种我们每个人都能感受到的情绪，是我们活着的重要理由之一。
It is an emotion that each of us feels and is one of the important reasons why we are alive.
今天的这集节目，我们会一起用简单的中文，慢慢探索：爱是什么？
In today's episode, we will use simple Chinese to slowly explore: What is love?
为什么我们会爱？
Why do we love?
它带给我们什么？
What does it bring us?
我们还会听到一个小故事，让你在学习语言的同时，也感受到温柔的力量。
We will also hear a short story that will allow you to feel the power of gentleness while learning the language.
准备好了吗？
Are you ready?
那我们现在就开始吧！
So let’s get started now!
她叫小丽，是我大学时的一个同学。
Her name is Xiaoli, and she was a classmate of mine in college.
第一次见到她的时候，她坐在图书馆角落，低着头写着什么，阳光刚好照在她的头发上，
When I first saw her, she was sitting in a corner of the library, writing something with her head down. The sunlight just happened to shine on her hair.
像是有一点点光。
Like there's a little bit of light.
她不是那种一眼就惊艳的人，但你会慢慢发现她的特别。
She is not the kind of person who amazes you at first sight, but you will slowly discover her specialness.
小丽总是笑着说话，声音不大，却让人觉得安心。
Xiaoli always speaks with a smile, her voice is not loud, but it makes people feel at ease.
她有一个小本子，喜欢在上面记下每天遇到的小事情，
She has a small notebook where she likes to write down the little things she encounters every day.
比如“今天有人帮我捡了掉在地上的橡皮”、“今天自己一个人去吃了饭，
For example, "Someone helped me pick up the eraser that fell on the ground today", "I went to eat alone today,
居然不觉得孤单”。
I don’t feel lonely.”
她说，这是她记录“被爱的瞬间”的方法。
She said this was her way of recording "the moment of being loved".
大学三年，她谈了两次恋爱。
During her three years in college, she had two relationships.
第一次是在大一的时候，那个男生是我们学校篮球队的，很阳光，很受欢迎。
The first time was when I was a freshman in college. The boy was on our school’s basketball team. He was very sunny and popular.
他追了小丽一个月，小丽才答应。
He pursued Xiaoli for a month before she agreed.
他们在一起后，一开始每天都很甜蜜，一起吃饭、上课、去操场散步。
After they got together, every day was sweet at first. They ate together, went to class together, and went for walks on the playground.
但后来，那男生越来越忙，对她越来越冷淡。
But later, the boy became busier and busier and became colder and colder towards her.
有一次，小丽生日，男生忘了，还说：“我最近太累了，没空记那么多事。
Once, it was Xiaoli’s birthday, but the boy forgot about it and said, “I’m too tired recently and don’t have time to remember so many things.
”那天晚上，小丽一个人走回宿舍，没有哭，只是低着头，一句话也没说。
"That night, Xiaoli walked back to the dormitory alone. She didn't cry, but just lowered her head and didn't say a word.
第二天，她就分手了。
The next day, she broke up.
朋友问她：“你难过吗？
Her friend asked her, “Are you sad?
”她点头，说：“当然难过，但我不后悔喜欢过他。
"She nodded and said, "Of course I'm sad, but I don't regret liking him.
”她笑了笑，又加了一句：“我是真的用心去爱他，只是他没有准备好接住那份心意而已。
"She smiled and added, "I really love him with all my heart, but he is not ready to accept that love.
"” 这句话我一直记得。
” I always remember this sentence.
"我们常常觉得，只有结果好的爱情才值得回忆，但其实，有时候，
We often think that only love with a good ending is worth remembering, but in fact, sometimes,
爱本身就已经足够美好了。
Love itself is beautiful enough.
Love itself is beautiful,
Love itself is beautiful,
even if it doesn’t last forever. (爱本身就是美好的，
even if it doesn’t last forever. (Love itself is beautiful,
即使它不能永远持续。
Even if it can't last forever.
") 到了大三，小丽又喜欢上了一个男生，是她的室友介绍的，叫阿杰。
) In her junior year, Xiaoli fell in love with another boy, who was introduced by her roommate, named Ajie.
"阿杰不是那种浪漫的人，也不太会说甜言蜜语，但他会在小丽感冒时送药过来，
Ajie is not a romantic person, nor is he good at sweet talk, but he would bring medicine to Xiaoli when she caught a cold.
会在她加班到很晚时等她回宿舍，然后一起吃泡面。
When she worked overtime until late, I would wait for her to return to the dormitory and then eat instant noodles together.
他们在一起之后，小丽好像变了很多，不再那么敏感，也不再总是怀疑自己。
After they were together, Xiaoli seemed to have changed a lot. She was no longer so sensitive and no longer always doubted herself.
她开始更有自信，笑容也变多了。
She started to feel more confident and smiled more often.
有一次我问她：“你为什么又敢去爱？
Once I asked her: "Why do you dare to love again?
”她说：“因为我知道，即使会受伤，我也不想让害怕变成阻碍。
"Because I knew that even if it would hurt, I didn't want to let fear get in the way," she said.
爱人是一种勇气，也是一种成长。
Loving someone is a kind of courage and also a kind of growth.
"” 后来，他们毕业了。
” Later, they graduated.
"阿杰去南方工作，小丽留在北方继续读研。
Ajie went to the south to work, and Xiaoli stayed in the north to continue her postgraduate studies.
异地恋很辛苦，他们试着每天都视频，但还是越来越少联系。
Long-distance relationships are hard. They tried to video chat every day, but they still contacted each other less and less.
最后一次通话，两人都哭了，没有吵架，只是轻轻地说：“我们先停一停吧。
During the last call, both of them cried, but they didn’t quarrel. They just said softly, “Let’s stop for a while.
”那天晚上，小丽又写了一句话在她的小本子上：“我不是不爱了，
That night, Xiaoli wrote another sentence in her little notebook: "It's not that I don't love you anymore.
只是我们都要往自己的方向走了。
We all just have to go in our own directions.
"” 几年过去了，小丽变成了老师，每天面对一群小孩子，教他们画画、讲故事。
” A few years later, Xiaoli became a teacher, facing a group of children every day, teaching them to draw and tell stories.
"她说，她喜欢现在的生活，也喜欢过去那个会在图书馆角落写日记的自己。
She said that she likes her current life, and also likes the past self who would write a diary in the corner of the library.
她还说：“有一天，也许我还会再遇到一个人，也许不会。
She added: “Maybe one day I’ll meet someone again, maybe not.
但我知道，我不会停止去爱这个世界。
But I know that I will never stop loving this world.
"” 为什么我们会爱？
” Why do we love?
"不是因为我们不怕失去，而是因为爱让我们变得完整。
It's not because we are not afraid of losing, but because love makes us complete.
有时候我们爱一个人，不是因为他多特别，而是因为在他面前，我们可以做自己。
Sometimes we love someone not because he is so special, but because we can be ourselves in front of him.
We love because we feel seen, safe,
We love because we feel seen, safe,
and understood. (我们之所以爱，
We love, and understood.
是因为我们在那个人面前感受到被看见、安全和被理解。
It’s because we feel seen, safe and understood in the presence of that person.
") 小丽教会我的，不是怎么去谈一场完美的恋爱，而是怎么用一颗不完美但真诚的心，
) What Xiaoli taught me was not how to have a perfect relationship, but how to use an imperfect but sincere heart.
"去面对人生里所有的相遇和分别。
Face all the encounters and separations in life.
她的故事很平凡，没有戏剧化的高潮，但却像一杯温热的水，在你不注意的时候，
Her story is ordinary, without a dramatic climax, but it is like a cup of warm water, which warms you when you are not paying attention.
慢慢温暖了你。
Slowly warming you up.
有一次她和我说：“你知道吗？
One time she said to me, “You know what?
每一次真心去爱的人，最后都会更靠近自己的心。
Every time you truly love someone, they will eventually be closer to your heart.
”我点点头，那一刻我明白了，爱并不总是要拥有，有时候，
I nodded, and at that moment I understood that love does not always mean possession. Sometimes,
只是静静地陪着一个人走一段路，然后微笑着放手，也是一种深深的爱。
Just quietly accompanying someone for a while, and then letting go with a smile, is also a kind of deep love.
就像小丽在日记里写的最后一句：“愿我爱的，和爱我的人，都平安。
Just like the last sentence Xiaoli wrote in her diary: "May those I love, and those who love me, be safe.
”这是一句很简单的愿望，却藏着最深的情感。
"This is a very simple wish, but it hides the deepest emotion.
因为无论爱有多短暂，它在你心里留下的，是温柔的痕迹，是你成长的印记，
Because no matter how short love is, what it leaves in your heart is a trace of tenderness and a mark of your growth.
也是你变得更好的理由。
It is also the reason for you to become better.
在这个世界上，我们都会经历爱，失去爱，再去爱。
In this world, we all experience love, lose love, and love again.
而在这些经历中，我们会流泪，会微笑，会学会原谅，也会学会珍惜。
And through these experiences, we will shed tears, smile, learn to forgive, and learn to cherish.
或许，有一天你也会像小丽一样，在某个阳光温柔的下午，拿起笔，
Perhaps, one day you will be like Xiaoli, picking up a pen on a sunny afternoon.
写下：“我曾认真地爱过一个人，也被这个世界温柔地爱过。
Write: "I once loved someone seriously, and was also loved tenderly by the world.
"” 为什么我们会爱？
” Why do we love?
"也许这是人类最古老的问题之一。
Perhaps this is one of humanity's oldest questions.
爱不是逻辑推理的结果，它常常出现在你毫无准备的时候。
Love is not the result of logical reasoning; it often appears when you are least prepared.
你可能只是回头看了一眼，就爱上了某个人的笑容；你可能只是听到一句温柔的问候，
You may just look back and fall in love with someone's smile; you may just hear a gentle greeting,
心里就泛起了波澜。
My heart was filled with waves.
我们会爱，是因为内心有一种渴望——渴望被理解，渴望被接纳，
We love because we have a desire in our hearts - a desire to be understood and accepted.
渴望与另一个人建立起超越孤独的连接。
The desire to connect with another person to transcend loneliness.
那种感觉，就像是在茫茫人海中，有一个人对你说：“嘿，我看见你了。
It’s like when someone in a huge crowd says to you, “Hey, I see you.
"” 心理学家说，爱是一种深层的情感依附（attachment）。
” Psychologists say that love is a deep emotional attachment.
"当我们与某人产生联系，并感觉对方是安全的港湾时，
When we connect with someone and feel like they are a safe haven,
我们的大脑会释放一种叫做“催产素”的荷尔蒙，
Our brain releases a hormone called oxytocin.
这种物质会让我们感到温暖、信任和依赖。
This substance makes us feel warm, trustful and dependent.
但即使没有科学的解释，我们的心也知道：当你靠近那个人时，世界就安静了；
But even without a scientific explanation, our hearts know: when you are close to that person, the world is quiet;
当你听见他笑，你的烦恼就轻了。
When you hear him laugh, your troubles are relieved.
那不是偶然，那是爱在悄悄生长。
That is not a coincidence, that is love growing quietly.
小时候，我们最先体验到的爱来自父母。
When we were children, the first love we experienced came from our parents.
是他们在我们哭的时候抱着我们，在我们生病的时候守着我们。
They are the ones who hold us when we cry and watch over us when we are sick.
这种无条件的爱给了我们第一份“被需要”的感觉。
This unconditional love gives us our first feeling of being needed.
长大后，我们开始学会去爱别人，从朋友，到伴侣，再到自己的孩子。
As we grow up, we begin to learn to love others, from friends to partners to our own children.
爱是一种循环，它让我们传递温暖，也让我们接受温暖。
Love is a cycle that allows us to pass on warmth and also receive warmth.
爱也许不是永远的，但它给我们留下的东西，却是永恒的。
Love may not be forever, but what it leaves us is eternal.
有些人说：“我不敢再爱了，因为上一次受伤太重。
Some people say, “I don’t dare to love again because I was hurt so badly last time.
”但正是因为那份疼痛曾经那么真实，才说明你曾那么认真地付出过。
"But it is precisely because the pain was once so real that it shows that you have given it so seriously.
痛苦也是爱的一部分。
Pain is also part of love.
它教会我们更温柔地对待别人，也教会我们保护自己的心。
It teaches us to treat others more gently and also teaches us to protect our own hearts.
正如一句英文说的那样：“Love is not about never getting hurt. It’s about finding someone worth the pain.”（爱并不是永远不会受伤，
As the English saying goes: "Love is not about never getting hurt. It’s about finding someone worth the pain."
而是找到那个值得你承受所有伤痛的人。
It's about finding someone who is worth all the pain you endure.
"） 我们会爱，是因为我们都需要连接。
） We love because we all need connection.
"在这个快节奏、高效率的世界里，人们变得越来越孤单。
In this fast-paced, high-efficiency world, people are becoming increasingly lonely.
手机带来的是联系，却不是连接。
Mobile phones bring contact, but not connection.
你可以发一百条信息，却依然感到空虚。
You can send a hundred messages and still feel empty.
真正的连接，是当你累了，有人听你说话；是当你沉默时，有人懂你的沉默。
True connection is when someone listens to you when you are tired; when someone understands your silence when you are silent.
有一位作家曾说：“人与人之间最深的情感，不是激情，而是理解。
A writer once said: "The deepest emotion between people is not passion, but understanding.
”我们爱一个人，往往是因为他懂我们，不需要太多语言，
"We love someone because he understands us, without too many words.
就能触碰到我们内心最柔软的地方。
It can touch the softest part of our hearts.
爱也会让我们变得更好。
Love also makes us better.
当你真正爱一个人，你会希望自己变得更值得被爱。
When you truly love someone, you will want to become more worthy of being loved.
你开始注意自己的脾气，学会倾听，学会耐心。
You begin to pay attention to your temper, learn to listen, and learn to be patient.
你不再只考虑自己的感受，而是开始关心“我们”的未来。
You stop thinking about your own feelings and start caring about our future.
比如以前你可能习惯说：“我想……”但当你爱一个人时，
For example, you may have been used to saying, "I want..." But when you love someone,
你会自然地说：“我们可以一起……”这种改变，不是因为被要求，
You will naturally say: "We can do it together..." This change is not because you are asked.
而是因为你发自内心地想对这个人好。
It's because you sincerely want to be good to this person.
当然，爱也不是完美的。
Of course, love is not perfect.
有时候我们会误解、争吵、甚至伤害彼此。
Sometimes we misunderstand, argue, and even hurt each other.
但只要你愿意回头看看，那些不完美中，也藏着深深的在乎。
But as long as you are willing to look back, you will find that deep care is hidden in those imperfections.
一个人愿意为你生气、愿意和你吵，说明你对他来说不是无关紧要的人。
If a person is willing to get angry for you and argue with you, it means that you are not an unimportant person to him.
最怕的，是冷漠，是沉默，是连解释的欲望都没有了。
What I fear most is indifference, silence, and the loss of even the desire to explain.
我们还会爱，是因为生命本身就需要爱来滋养。
We still love because life itself needs love to nourish.
没有爱的人生，可能很安全，但也很空。
A life without love may be safe, but it is also empty.
想象一下，如果每天都只是工作、吃饭、睡觉，没有一个人可以分享你的喜怒哀乐，
Imagine if you just work, eat, and sleep every day, and there is no one to share your joys and sorrows.
那样的生活会变成什么样？
What would that life be like?
爱让我们的世界有了颜色、有了声音、有了方向。
Love gives our world color, sound and direction.
哪怕你只是收到一句：“今天还好吗？
Even if you just receive a “How are you today?
”你也会觉得，啊，原来我不是一个人。
"You will also feel that, ah, it turns out that I am not alone.
在日常生活中，爱的表现很细微。
In daily life, expressions of love are subtle.
有时候是朋友记得你喜欢喝的那种咖啡；有时候是妈妈把你不爱吃的菜偷偷换成你喜欢的；
Sometimes it’s your friend who remembers the kind of coffee you like to drink; sometimes it’s your mother who secretly replaces the dish you don’t like with the one you like;
有时候是恋人明明也很忙，却还是抽时间给你打个电话。
Sometimes, even though your lover is very busy, he or she still finds time to call you.
这些小动作，也许不会被写进小说，但它们才是真正让我们感受到“被爱”的证据。
These small actions may not be written into novels, but they are the real evidence that makes us feel loved.
As the saying goes,
As the saying goes,
“Love is in the details.”（爱藏在细节里。
“Love is in the details.”
"） 所以，我们会爱，不是因为别人完美，也不是因为我们自己多勇敢，
) So, we love not because others are perfect, nor because we are brave.
"而是因为那一刻，我们相信了“你和我在一起，会变得更好”。
But it was because at that moment, we believed that "things will be better if you are with me."
也许我们曾失败、曾失望，但只要我们还愿意打开心门，还愿意再次相信，
Maybe we have failed and been disappointed before, but as long as we are willing to open our hearts and believe again,
就一定会再次遇见属于我们的光。
We will definitely meet the light that belongs to us again.
在小丽的故事中，她说过一句话：“爱不是找到一个完美的人，
In Xiaoli's story, she said: "Love is not about finding a perfect person.
而是学会用温柔去拥抱不完美。
Instead, learn to embrace imperfection with tenderness.
”这句话，我想送给正在听这段话的你。
"I want to give this sentence to you who are listening to this.
不管你此刻在世界哪个角落，不管你有没有正经历爱情，请你记得：你之所以会爱，
No matter where you are in the world, no matter whether you are experiencing love or not, please remember: the reason you love is
是因为你有一颗柔软、愿意靠近他人的心，而这颗心，是这个世界最美的礼物。
It is because you have a soft heart that is willing to get close to others, and this heart is the most beautiful gift in the world.
爱情，从来都不是完美无缺的童话故事，
Love is never a perfect fairy tale.
而是由真实、挣扎、原谅与成长交织而成的一段旅程。
It is a journey woven together by truth, struggle, forgiveness and growth.
每一段感情中，都会有失望，也会有犹豫，有时甚至会有泪水和孤独。
In every relationship, there will be disappointment, hesitation, and sometimes even tears and loneliness.
但正因为如此，它才那么动人。
But that's what makes it so moving.
当我们爱上一个人，我们并不是爱他有多完美，而是在他所有的缺点和混乱中，
When we fall in love with someone, we don't love him for how perfect he is, but for all his flaws and messes.
我们仍然愿意留在他身边。
We still want to stay with him.
这种爱，是一种选择，是一次次在不完美中，依然决定靠近的坚持。
This kind of love is a choice. It is the persistence of staying close to each other despite imperfections.
小丽在她第二段感情中学到最多的，不是怎么避免受伤，而是怎么在受伤之后，
What Xiaoli learned most in her second relationship was not how to avoid getting hurt, but how to
依然保持善良。
Still stay kind.
她说：“当一个人让你失望，你可以生气、可以难过，
She said: "When someone disappoints you, you can be angry and sad.
但不要让这份失望改变了你相信爱的心。
But don't let this disappointment change your belief in love.
”她曾经也一度不再相信爱情，觉得人与人之间只是彼此利用，各取所需。
"She once stopped believing in love and felt that people were just using each other for their own needs.
但后来她明白了，人与人之间最珍贵的，不是完美的契合，而是愿意彼此磨合的耐心。
But later she understood that the most precious thing between people is not the perfect fit, but the patience to work with each other.
我们常说，“爱是包容”，但包容不是盲目的忍耐，而是一种基于理解的体谅。
We often say, "Love is tolerance", but tolerance is not blind endurance, but a kind of consideration based on understanding.
比如，当你的伴侣工作很累，回家没有精力说太多话，这时候你选择给他一个安静的拥抱，
For example, when your partner is very tired from work and doesn't have the energy to talk too much when he gets home, you choose to give him a quiet hug.
而不是不停地追问他是不是不爱你了；又比如，当你发现对方和你在某些想法上有分歧，
Instead of constantly asking him if he doesn't love you anymore; for example, when you find that he and you have different ideas,
你不是急着去改变他，而是试着站在他的角度去思考，这些都是爱的智慧。
You should not rush to change him, but try to think from his perspective. This is the wisdom of love.
有一句英文说得很动人：“True love is not about finding the right person,
There is a very touching English saying: "True love is not about finding the right person,
but learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.”（真正的爱不是找到一个完美的人，
but learning to see an imperfect person perfectly." (True love is not about finding a perfect person,
而是学会用最美的眼光看待一个不完美的人。
Instead, learn to look at an imperfect person in the most beautiful light.
）我们都不是理想化的王子或公主，我们也许有过去的伤痕，有情绪的低谷，有些坏习惯，
We are not ideal princes or princesses. We may have scars from the past, emotional lows, and some bad habits.
有些不成熟的反应，但如果在这些不完美中，有一个人愿意牵着你的手说：“没关系，
There are some immature reactions, but if there is someone willing to hold your hand and say, "It's okay,
我们一起慢慢变好”，那就是值得珍惜的爱情。
Let’s slowly get better together”, that is the love worth cherishing.
小丽和阿杰在一起的那几年，并不总是顺利。
The years that Xiaoli and Ajie were together were not always smooth.
他们曾因为未来的规划而争执，曾因为误解而冷战，甚至有一段时间两个人几乎不再联系。
They had argued over future plans, had cold wars over misunderstandings, and there was even a time when the two of them had almost no contact at all.
但在分开的那一天，小丽对他说的不是责备，而是：“谢谢你陪我走过这段路，
But on the day they separated, Xiaoli did not blame him, but said: "Thank you for accompanying me through this journey.
也谢谢你让我知道，我是一个值得被好好爱的人。
Thank you for letting me know that I am a person who deserves to be loved well.
”那一刻，她的声音很轻，但眼睛很亮。
"At that moment, her voice was soft, but her eyes were bright.
她不是没有伤心，只是学会了在伤心中成长。
It’s not that she wasn’t sad, she just learned to grow in sadness.
爱情教会我们一个重要的道理：不是每一段关系都必须走到最后，
Love teaches us an important truth: not every relationship has to last.
但每一段关系都可以教会我们一些东西。
But every relationship has something to teach us.
有的人来，是为了陪你走到终点；有的人来，是为了教会你如何走下去。
Some people come to accompany you to the end; some people come to teach you how to go on.
We don’t meet people by accident. They are meant to cross our path for a reason.（我们遇见每一个人都不是偶然的，
We don’t meet people by accident. They are meant to cross our path for a reason.
他们出现在我们生命中，总有原因。
They appear in our lives for a reason.
"） 在现实生活中，很多人害怕爱，是因为太多时候我们把爱和“拥有”绑在一起。
） In real life, many people are afraid of love because too often we tie love to ""possession"".
"我们以为爱一个人，就一定要在一起、要每天联系、要有未来。
We think that if we love someone, we must be together, keep in touch every day, and have a future.
但其实，爱最深的样子，有时候是放手。
But in fact, the deepest form of love is sometimes letting go.
是你明知道他不会陪你到最后，却还是愿意祝福他拥有属于自己的幸福。
Even though you know he won't stay with you until the end, you are still willing to wish him happiness of his own.
是你在夜深人静时，想起他的名字，心里不再痛，而是微笑着说一句：“谢谢你来过。
It is when you think of his name in the dead of night, your heart no longer aches, but you smile and say, "Thank you for coming.
"” 爱不是控制，而是自由；不是要求，而是给予。
” Love is not about control, but about freedom; it is not about demanding, but about giving.
"当我们用开放的心去爱，我们会发现，即使结果不如预期，过程依然值得。
When we love with an open heart, we will find that even if the result is not as expected, the process is still worth it.
你因为某个人变得温柔、变得坚定、学会了倾听、学会了理解，这些变化，
Because of someone, you become gentle, firm, learn to listen, and learn to understand. These changes,
都是爱给你的礼物。
They are all gifts given to you by love.
还有一种很重要的爱，常常被忽略，那就是对自己的爱。
There is another very important kind of love that is often overlooked, and that is love for oneself.
很多人以为，只有把自己全部给出去，才是真正的爱。
Many people think that true love is when you give your all.
但其实，一个真正健康的爱，是先学会好好爱自己。
But in fact, a truly healthy love is to learn to love yourself first.
当你学会照顾好自己的身体，尊重自己的感受，不为了讨好别人而委屈自己，
When you learn to take good care of your body, respect your own feelings, and don't put yourself in a difficult position to please others,
你才有能力去爱别人。
You are capable of loving others.
Self-love is not selfish. You cannot truly love another until you know how to love yourself.（自爱不是自私，
Self-love is not selfish. You cannot truly love another until you know how to love yourself.
你必须先懂得如何爱自己，才能真正去爱别人。
You must first know how to love yourself before you can truly love others.
"） 小丽在结束和阿杰的感情后，花了很多时间去独处。
） After ending her relationship with Ajie, Xiaoli spent a lot of time alone.
"她去旅行，去参加画画课，去读书写日记。
She travels, takes painting classes, reads books and keeps a journal.
她说：“我不再焦虑下一段感情什么时候来，而是把爱转回来，给自己。
She said: "I no longer worry about when the next relationship will come, but instead turn the love back to myself.
”她开始每天对着镜子笑，开始为自己煮饭、买花。
"She started smiling in front of the mirror every day, cooking for herself and buying flowers.
她的朋友圈里写着一句话：“我现在一个人，也很好。
She wrote in her circle of friends: “I am alone now, and it’s fine.
"” 这不是孤独，而是一种平静的幸福。
” This is not loneliness, but a kind of peaceful happiness.
"当你不再因为没有伴侣而感到空虚，当你一个人也能生活得有滋有味，
When you no longer feel empty because you don't have a partner, and when you can live a fulfilling life alone,
那么下次爱情来的时候，你就不会是带着缺口去找人填补自己，而是带着完整的自己，
Then the next time love comes, you will not be looking for someone to fill your gaps, but you will be complete with yourself.
和对方一起走得更远。
Go further with each other.
所以亲爱的你，如果你此刻正陷在一段感情的痛苦中，请记得，你不是不值得被爱，
So my dear, if you are in the pain of a relationship right now, please remember that you are not unworthy of being loved.
而是你值得更好的爱；如果你还没有遇到那个特别的人，也请相信：你并不孤单，因为爱，
But you deserve better love; if you haven't met that special person yet, please believe: you are not alone, because love,
总会在某个你不经意的时候悄悄靠近。
It will always come quietly to you when you least expect it.
而如果你已经拥有了一个愿意陪你走过风雨的人，请你学会珍惜，
If you already have someone who is willing to accompany you through the ups and downs, please learn to cherish him/her.
不要因为一点小事就放弃，不要让冷漠代替了关心，让沉默代替了沟通。
Don't give up because of a small thing. Don't let indifference replace care and silence replace communication.
爱情永远不是完美的，但我们可以用真心和耐心，让它变得越来越好。
Love is never perfect, but we can use our sincerity and patience to make it better and better.
愿你在爱里找到温柔的光，也愿你成为别人眼中值得去爱的那道光。
May you find the gentle light in love, and may you become the light worthy of love in the eyes of others.
小丽的故事还没有结束。
Xiaoli’s story is not over yet.
她说，在她重新学会爱自己之后，
She said that after she learned to love herself again,
她才真正理解了一句话的含义：“当你不再急着去寻找爱，
She finally understood the meaning of the sentence: "When you are no longer in a hurry to find love,
爱反而会以一种温柔的方式靠近你。
Instead, love will approach you in a gentle way.
”有一天，她正在公园里散步，阳光暖暖的，风吹过她耳边，她看见一个小男孩摔倒了，
"One day, she was walking in the park. The sun was warm and the wind was blowing past her ears. She saw a little boy fall down.
旁边的年轻男子赶紧跑过去把他扶起来，那一刻，
The young man next to him ran over and helped him up. At that moment,
她突然想起了小时候爸爸也是这样把她抱起来的样子。
She suddenly remembered how her father held her in his arms when she was a child.
那名男子并没有发现她的目光，只是轻声安慰着孩子，确认没事后才松了一口气。
The man did not notice her gaze. He just comforted the child softly and breathed a sigh of relief after confirming that everything was fine.
就是那一幕，让小丽心里某个地方动了一下。
It was that scene that touched something in Xiaoli's heart.
她不是突然就喜欢上了他，而是那个画面，让她重新相信，
She didn't fall in love with him suddenly, but that scene made her believe again.
这个世界上还是有人愿意细心地照顾他人，有人心里装着温柔的责任。
There are still people in this world who are willing to take good care of others, and there are still people who carry a gentle sense of responsibility in their hearts.
几天后，她又在同一个公园遇到了那个男子。
A few days later, she met the man again in the same park.
他在给孩子讲故事，小丽听见他说：“在这个世界上，最重要的不是你拥有什么，
He was telling a story to the children, and Xiaoli heard him say: "In this world, the most important thing is not what you have,
而是你是否拥有愿意为你停下脚步的人。
But whether you have someone who is willing to stop for you.
”她轻轻地笑了，因为那句话，就像她这些年一直在心里找的答案。
"She smiled gently, because that sentence was like the answer she had been looking for in her heart all these years.
那天，他们第一次打了招呼，彼此都很自然地聊起了生活、孩子、梦想和爱。
That day, they greeted each other for the first time and naturally talked about life, children, dreams and love.
那个人叫周宇，是一位离异的父亲，正在独自抚养儿子。
The man's name is Zhou Yu, a divorced father who is raising his son alone.
他没有太多浪漫的言语，也不懂得用花言巧语表达爱意，但他说的每一句话都很真诚，
He doesn't have many romantic words, nor does he know how to express his love with sweet talk, but every word he says is sincere.
他的眼神里有一种让人安心的力量。
There is a reassuring power in his eyes.
小丽没有急着进入一段新关系，她花了好几个月慢慢了解对方，观察他的生活态度，
Xiaoli did not rush into a new relationship. She spent several months getting to know the other person and observing his attitude towards life.
看他怎样对待父母、孩子和朋友。
See how he treats his parents, children, and friends.
她学会了不被一时的激情冲昏头脑，而是用心去感受一个人的本质。
She learned not to be carried away by momentary passion, but to feel a person's essence with her heart.
周宇也没有催促什么，他只是陪着她，一起去市场买菜，一起在傍晚散步，
Zhou Yu did not urge her. He just accompanied her to the market to buy vegetables and to take a walk in the evening.
一起在下雨的时候看窗外。
Look out the window together when it rains.
那是一种非常简单、平凡、却很踏实的陪伴。
It is a very simple, ordinary, yet down-to-earth companionship.
Love doesn't have to be loud. Sometimes it whispers through actions,
Love doesn't have to be loud. Sometimes it whispers through actions,
not words.（爱不需要太响亮，
Love doesn't need to be loud,
它有时候是通过行动、而不是语言轻声地表达。
It is sometimes expressed quietly through actions rather than words.
"） 有一次，小丽感冒了，发烧得很厉害。
) Once, Xiaoli caught a cold and had a severe fever.
"她没有告诉任何人，只是自己一个人躺在家里。
She didn't tell anyone and just lay alone at home.
没想到晚上有人敲门，是周宇，他拿着退烧药和热粥，说：“我感觉你今天声音不太对，
Unexpectedly, someone knocked on the door at night. It was Zhou Yu. He brought antipyretic medicine and hot porridge and said, "I feel like your voice is not right today.
就来看看。
Come and see.
”那一刻，小丽眼眶红了。
"At that moment, Xiaoli's eyes were red.
她不是因为感动于一碗粥，而是因为她终于明白，有人把她的情绪放在心上，
She was not moved by a bowl of porridge, but because she finally understood that someone took her emotions to heart.
有人愿意主动靠近她，而不是等她开口求助。
Someone was willing to approach her proactively instead of waiting for her to ask for help.
从那以后，小丽告诉自己，如果这段感情能继续下去，她不会再害怕受伤了。
From then on, Xiaoli told herself that if this relationship could continue, she would no longer be afraid of being hurt.
因为她不再是那个只知道付出、把自己变小的人了。
Because she is no longer the person who only knows how to give and make herself smaller.
她已经成为了一个独立、有爱也有底线的自己。
She has become an independent, loving and self-reliant person.
她开始在爱里寻找成长，而不是依赖。
She began to seek growth in love rather than dependence.
她知道，真正健康的关系，不是互相控制，而是互相支持；不是绑在一起，
She knows that a truly healthy relationship is not about controlling each other, but about supporting each other; it is not about being tied together,
而是肩并肩一起走路。
Instead, they walked side by side.
周宇也在这段关系里慢慢放下过去的伤痕。
Zhou Yu also slowly let go of the scars of the past in this relationship.
他说：“以前我总觉得自己是失败的父亲，失败的丈夫。
He said: “I used to feel like I was a failed father and a failed husband.
但现在我觉得，遇到你之后，我愿意重新去努力，去相信，去温柔。
But now I feel that after meeting you, I am willing to work hard again, to believe, and to be gentle.
”他们没有设定什么宏大的未来计划，也没有许下海誓山盟，
"They didn't make any grand plans for the future, nor did they make any vows of love.
但他们每天都在用行动告诉对方：我在这里，我愿意走下去。
But every day they tell each other with their actions: I am here, and I am willing to keep going.
慢慢地，小丽也和那个小男孩建立起了感情。
Gradually, Xiaoli also developed feelings for the little boy.
她学会了为孩子准备早餐，学会了给他讲睡前故事，也学会了在他哭的时候不着急哄，
She learned how to prepare breakfast for her child, how to tell him bedtime stories, and how not to rush to comfort him when he cried.
而是先陪他一起坐着，等待他情绪慢慢安静。
Instead, sit with him and wait for him to calm down.
她发现，爱一个孩子，其实就是学会放下自己的急躁和控制，给他时间，也给自己空间。
She found that loving a child actually means learning to let go of your impatience and control, giving him time, and giving yourself space.
这和爱一个大人，其实没有太大区别。
This is actually not much different from loving an adult.
爱，从来都不是一件容易的事，它需要耐心、理解、沟通和不断地调整。
Love is never an easy thing, it requires patience, understanding, communication and constant adjustment.
但正因为如此，当我们愿意努力地去爱、去照顾、去陪伴时，那份感情才变得特别有价值。
But precisely because of this, when we are willing to work hard to love, care and accompany, that relationship becomes particularly valuable.
真正值得的爱，往往不是一开始就轰轰烈烈的，而是日复一日地相处中，
The love that is truly worthwhile is often not vigorous at the beginning, but is developed through getting along day by day.
一点一滴累积的信任和安心。
Trust and peace of mind accumulated bit by bit.
小丽现在常常对朋友说：“我并不是找到了完美的人，
Xiaoli often tells her friends now: "I didn't find the perfect person.
我只是找到了一个愿意跟我一起变好的人。
I just found someone who was willing to get better with me.
”她说她也会害怕，害怕未来会不会再次失望，但她已经学会了，爱不是把全部交出去，
"She said she was also afraid, afraid of being disappointed again in the future, but she had learned that love is not about giving everything away.
而是在给予中，也保留自己的一部分温柔和坚定。
But in giving, we should also retain some of our own gentleness and firmness.
她不再像以前那样急着证明什么，而是学会了在爱中慢下来，
She is no longer in a hurry to prove anything like before, but has learned to slow down in love.
用一颗平常心去陪伴、去等待、去相信。
Accompany, wait and believe with a normal heart.
所以你看，爱一个人，并不是一场冲动，而是一种选择，一种持续的行动，
So you see, loving someone is not an impulse, but a choice, a continuous action.
一种愿意每天都为对方多走一步的态度。
An attitude of being willing to go the extra mile for the other person every day.
也许我们都会遇到挫折，也许会有疲惫和灰心，但只要你还愿意认真去爱，
Maybe we will encounter setbacks, fatigue and discouragement, but as long as you are willing to love seriously,
那个爱你的人终究会感受到你的心。
The person who loves you will eventually feel your heart.
最后，小丽在日记里写下了一句话：“我愿意用我的温柔，换一个人的坚定。
Finally, Xiaoli wrote a sentence in her diary: "I am willing to exchange my gentleness for someone else's firmness.
”这句话也许很简单，但它代表着一个人经历风雨之后，
"This sentence may be simple, but it represents a person who has gone through hardships.
依然愿意相信爱、选择爱、成为爱本身的勇气。
Still willing to have the courage to believe in love, choose love, and become love itself.
而这样的爱，才是真正的奇迹。
And this kind of love is the real miracle.
我们常常把“爱”理解为男女之间的感情，但其实，真正的爱远远不止这一种形式。
We often understand "love" as the relationship between men and women, but in fact, true love is far more than this form.
小丽在和周宇相处的过程中，也越来越明白，人生中有很多种爱，
As Xiaoli gets along with Zhou Yu, she also understands more and more that there are many kinds of love in life.
都值得我们去珍惜和呵护。
They are all worthy of our cherishing and protection.
她说，有时候，一只猫每天蹭你一下，那是一种爱；有时候，
She said, sometimes, a cat rubs against you every day, that is a kind of love; sometimes,
朋友半夜给你发一条“你还好吗？
A friend sends you a message in the middle of the night saying “Are you okay?
”的消息，那也是爱；还有父母，每次你回家，
", that is also love; and parents, every time you go home,
他们都会给你准备你最喜欢吃的菜——这是最沉默却最深沉的爱。
They will all prepare your favorite dishes for you - this is the most silent but deepest love.
小时候我们不懂这些，总觉得爱就是甜言蜜语，是浪漫的表白，是节日里的礼物和惊喜。
When we were young, we didn’t understand these things. We always thought that love was sweet words, romantic confessions, and gifts and surprises during festivals.
但长大之后，我们才发现，真正长久的爱，往往藏在生活里最普通的细节里。
But when we grow up, we discover that true and lasting love is often hidden in the most ordinary details in life.
比如妈妈给你留了一盏灯，说“早点回来”；爸爸把你送到车站，
For example, your mother left a light on for you and said, "Come back early." Your father sent you to the station.
却只是轻轻说句“路上小心”；
But he just said gently, "Be careful on the road";
或者朋友默默帮你挡了一句不该你承受的批评……这些时刻没有鲜花、没有拥抱，
Or a friend silently shields you from a criticism you shouldn’t have to bear… There are no flowers or hugs at these moments.
但每一份沉默的付出，都是深藏的关心。
But every silent contribution is a hidden concern.
小丽也开始反思，过去自己是不是太狭隘地理解了“被爱”。
Xiaoli also began to reflect on whether she had understood "being loved" too narrowly in the past.
她以前总觉得，如果一个人没有每天说“我爱你”，那就是不在乎；
She used to think that if a person didn’t say “I love you” every day, then they didn’t care;
如果没有时时刻刻陪在身边，就是冷淡。
If you are not with me all the time, it means I am cold.
但后来她学会了看见那些不被语言表达的情感。
But then she learned to see the emotions that were not expressed in words.
她意识到，爱不是一个人有多会说话，而是他在你需要时是否真的会出现。
She realized that love is not about how well a person talks, but whether he really shows up when you need him.
It's not how much we say “I love you”,
It's not how much we say "I love you",
but how much we prove it through actions.（不是我们说了多少次“我爱你”，
but how much we prove it through actions.
而是我们通过多少行动证明这句话。
It's about how many actions we take to prove this statement.
"） 于是，她开始更加珍惜身边每一个对她好的人。
) So, she began to cherish everyone around her who was kind to her.
"她给多年不联系的朋友发消息说：“谢谢你曾在我最低谷的时候陪我吃了一顿饭。
She sent a message to a friend she hadn’t contacted for years, saying: “Thank you for having a meal with me when I was at my lowest.
”她给母亲买了一双鞋子，虽然妈妈嘴里说“浪费钱”，但笑容藏不住地挂在脸上。
"She bought a pair of shoes for her mother. Although her mother said it was a waste of money, she couldn't hide the smile on her face.
她开始理解父亲那些年沉默背后的温柔，也开始对弟弟的调皮多一分宽容，因为她知道，
She began to understand the gentleness behind her father's silence during those years, and also began to be more tolerant of her brother's mischief, because she knew that
爱不只是浪漫，它更多是一种关系里的选择与坚持。
Love is not just romance, it is more of a choice and persistence in a relationship.
她甚至学会了感恩那些曾经让她受伤的人。
She even learned to be grateful to those who had hurt her.
她说：“如果不是他们让我跌倒，我可能到现在都不知道，原来我能自己站起来。
She said: “If they hadn’t made me fall, I might not have known until now that I could stand up on my own.
”爱，有时候是甜的，有时候是苦的，但它们都在教我们如何去活，如何去感受。
"Love is sometimes sweet, sometimes bitter, but they all teach us how to live and how to feel.
每一次心动、每一次失落、每一次原谅，都是我们心灵成长的一部分。
Every heartbeat, every loss, every forgiveness, is part of our spiritual growth.
在一次教学中，小丽问她的学生：“你们觉得爱是什么？
During a teaching session, Xiaoli asked her students: "What do you think love is?
”有个小女孩站起来说：“爱是爸爸每天都来接我放学，即使他很忙。
"A little girl stood up and said, "Love is that my dad picks me up from school every day, even if he is very busy.
”另一个男孩说：“爱是我奶奶每天给我准备早饭，她从来没说过‘我爱你’，
Another boy said, "Love is my grandma preparing breakfast for me every day and she never says 'I love you'.
但我知道她很爱我。
But I know she loves me very much.
”听着这些回答，小丽的眼睛湿润了。
"Hearing these answers, Xiaoli's eyes became moist.
孩子们还小，却已经懂得，爱不是一种语言，而是一种感觉，是你在被照顾的那一刻，
The children are still young, but they already understand that love is not a language, but a feeling. It is the moment when you are cared for.
自然而然生出的安全感。
A sense of security that comes naturally.
后来，小丽把这些孩子们的答案写在了自己的日记本上，她在最后写下：“真正的爱，
Later, Xiaoli wrote down the children's answers in her diary. At the end, she wrote: "True love,
是让人安心，是让人愿意变好，是不管你在哪里、什么时候，只要想到那个人，
It makes people feel at ease, makes people willing to change for the better, and makes people feel happy no matter where or when they are, as long as they think of that person.
你就知道自己不是一个人。
You know you are not alone.
”她明白了，爱不是一种激情，而是一种连接；不是依赖，而是力量；不是占有，
"She understood that love is not a passion, but a connection; not dependence, but strength; not possession,
而是成全。
But fulfillment.
她和周宇依然过着平凡的生活，没有惊天动地的浪漫，也没有轰轰烈烈的情节。
She and Zhou Yu still lead an ordinary life, without earth-shattering romance or spectacular plots.
每天就是送孩子上学，一起做饭，看一部老电影，聊聊工作和生活。
Every day we send the kids to school, cook together, watch an old movie, and talk about work and life.
可正是这些看似平凡的日子，让她感到从未有过的踏实。
But it was these seemingly ordinary days that made her feel more grounded than ever before.
她说：“爱情也许是一时的，但爱，是一生的选择。
She said: “Love may be temporary, but love is a lifelong choice.
它可以从亲情开始，也可以延续为友情，最终变成一种生命的温度。
It can start with family affection, continue into friendship, and finally become a kind of warmth of life.
"” 爱一个人，是生活中的一种能力；被爱，是一种幸运；而懂得各种形式的爱，
” Loving someone is a skill in life; being loved is a blessing; and understanding all forms of love,
"并懂得去回应它，则是一种深深的智慧。
And knowing how to respond to it is a deep wisdom.
我们总是希望遇见一个懂自己的人，其实，有时候，
We always hope to meet someone who understands us. In fact, sometimes,
我们也该问问自己：“我是不是也愿意去懂别人？
We should also ask ourselves: "Am I willing to understand others?
”当我们带着理解、包容和温柔去面对每一段关系时，爱会自然地流动，不需要强求，
"When we face every relationship with understanding, tolerance and tenderness, love will flow naturally without forcing it.
也不需要怀疑。
There is no need to doubt it.
生活并不会天天都像电影，爱情也不是每天都在高潮。
Life is not like a movie every day, and love does not climax every day.
但如果你愿意停下来，看见身边的那一点点温暖，一句轻声问候，一个简单动作，
But if you are willing to stop and see the little warmth around you, a gentle greeting, a simple gesture,
那你会发现，其实你一直活在爱之中。
Then you will find that you have actually been living in love.
爱，未必让你每天都心跳加速，但它一定会让你在疲惫时有个方向，在孤单时有个肩膀，
Love may not make your heart beat faster every day, but it will definitely give you a direction when you are tired and a shoulder to lean on when you are lonely.
在沉默时有个懂你的人。
There is someone who understands you when you are silent.
就像小丽最后写下的一句话：“有一天，我可能会老去、会忘记很多事，但我希望，
Just like what Xiaoli wrote at the end: "One day, I may grow old and forget many things, but I hope,
我永远不会忘记，这一生我曾深深地被爱过，也深深地爱过别人。
I will never forget that in this life I have been deeply loved and have loved others deeply.
”那是一种幸福，是一种力量，是一种即使世界变了模样，我们依然能紧握的温柔信仰。
"It is a kind of happiness, a kind of strength, and a kind of gentle belief that we can still hold on to even if the world changes.
当我们谈论“爱”的时候，很容易想到恋人之间的关系，但其实，
When we talk about love, it is easy to think of the relationship between lovers, but in fact,
爱还有一个更宽广、更深远的形态，那就是“陪伴”。
Love also has a broader and deeper form, which is "companionship".
很多人以为，爱是一种强烈的情绪，是心跳加速，是深情凝望，是无法自控地想念。
Many people think that love is a strong emotion, a accelerated heartbeat, a loving gaze, and uncontrollable longing.
可真正走过漫长人生之后你才会发现，真正打动人心的爱，往往不是轰轰烈烈，
But after going through a long life, you will find that the love that really touches people's hearts is often not grand and passionate.
而是静静地在你身边，不离不弃。
But stay by your side quietly, never leave you.
小丽渐渐意识到，她这一生最深刻的情感体验，并不是某个男生突然送她一束花，
Xiaoli gradually realized that the most profound emotional experience in her life was not a boy suddenly giving her a bouquet of flowers.
而是在她低谷时，有人愿意坐在她身边，即使不说话，也不会离开。
But when she was at her lowest, there was someone willing to sit next to her and not leave even if they didn't say anything.
这种陪伴，也许不浪漫，但却真实，是一种无声的支持。
This kind of companionship may not be romantic, but it is real and a silent support.
Love is when someone stays even when they have a thousand reasons to leave.（爱是即使有一千个离开的理由，
Love is when someone stays even when they have a thousand reasons to leave.
有人依然选择留下。
Some people still choose to stay.
"） 她开始懂得，人生里有很多重要的人，都不是以“恋人”的身份出现。
） She began to understand that many important people in life do not appear as ""lovers"".
"他们可能是父母，是朋友，是一个在你最不被理解的时候伸出手的陌生人。
They may be a parent, a friend, or a stranger who reaches out to you when you are least understood.
这些人不一定常常出现在你生活里，但只要你回头，总会觉得他们在那里。
These people may not appear in your life often, but as long as you look back, you will always feel that they are there.
陪伴不是每天都见面，不是时时都联系，而是在你心里有个地方，始终为他们留着。
Companionship does not mean seeing each other every day or contacting each other all the time, but it means having a place in your heart that is always reserved for them.
有一次，小丽回老家看望奶奶。
Once, Xiaoli went back to her hometown to visit her grandmother.
奶奶已经八十多岁了，耳朵不好，走路也慢。
My grandmother is over eighty years old, has poor hearing and walks slowly.
她们一起坐在院子里晒太阳，小丽问她：“奶奶，你年轻的时候，有没有过很轰动的爱情？
They sat together in the yard basking in the sun, and Xiaoli asked her, "Grandma, when you were young, did you have a sensational love?
”奶奶笑了笑，摇头说：“没有啊，我和你爷爷认识一年就结婚了，
Grandma smiled and shook her head and said, "No, your grandfather and I got married after knowing each other for only one year.
他也从来没有对我说‘我爱你’。
He never said 'I love you' to me either.
”小丽有些失望地问：“那你们相爱吗？
"Xiao Li asked somewhat disappointedly: "Are you in love?"
”奶奶沉默了一会儿，慢慢地说：“我不太会讲那些年轻人的话，但他每次都记得我怕冷，
"Grandma was silent for a while, and then she said slowly: "I am not very good at talking to young people, but he always remembers that I am afraid of the cold.
冬天出门一定先给我暖好鞋子。
When I go out in winter, I must warm my shoes first.
你说，这是不是爱？
You tell me, is this love?
"” 那一刻，小丽几乎要落泪。
"" At that moment, Xiaoli almost cried.
"原来，所谓爱，并不是非要说出来，而是在岁月里一点一滴地体现在每一个动作中。
It turns out that so-called love does not have to be expressed in words, but is reflected bit by bit in every action over the years.
不是情话动听，而是日子长久；不是热烈短暂，而是慢慢陪你过一生。
It’s not the sweet words of love, but the long days; it’s not the short-lived passion, but the slow companionship throughout your life.
她想起小时候爸爸每天接她放学，从不迟到；妈妈熬夜给她做手工课的作业；
She recalled that when she was a child, her father would pick her up from school every day and was never late; her mother would stay up late to do her homework for the handicraft class;
朋友在她失恋那天陪她喝了三杯咖啡却一言不发……这些点点滴滴，都是陪伴的爱。
On the day when she broke up, her friend drank three cups of coffee with her without saying a word... These little bits and pieces are the love of companionship.
她也开始重新理解友情。
She also began to understand friendship again.
以前她总觉得，朋友就是要一起出去玩，一起聊天、分享生活。
In the past, she always thought that friends should go out together, chat together, and share life together.
但随着年龄的增长，她明白了，真正的朋友，不在于有多少互动，
But as she grew older, she realized that true friends are not about how much interaction they have.
而在于你们之间是否有一种深深的信任和理解。
It depends on whether there is a deep trust and understanding between you.
哪怕很久不联系，只要你说“我需要你”，对方就会出现，那才是真正的爱。
Even if you haven’t been in touch for a long time, as long as you say “I need you”, the other person will appear. That is true love.
Friendship is when silence between two people is comfortable.（友情是两个人即使沉默，
Friendship is when silence between two people is comfortable.
也不会觉得尴尬。
It won’t feel awkward.
"） 她有一个大学时期的室友，毕业后去了国外，两人很少联系，但有一次小丽失眠，
) She had a roommate in college who went abroad after graduation. The two rarely contacted each other, but one time Xiaoli had insomnia.
"凌晨三点发了一条信息说：“我觉得我很失败。
At 3am, he sent a message saying, “I feel like a failure.
”几分钟后，对方就打来电话，用沙哑的声音说：“别怕，我在。
"A few minutes later, the other party called and said in a hoarse voice: "Don't be afraid, I'm here.
”那通电话并没有解决什么问题，也没有给她什么建议，但她记得，当电话挂断的那一刻，
"That phone call didn't solve any problems, nor did it give her any advice, but she remembered the moment she hung up the phone.
她安静地睡着了。
She fell asleep peacefully.
这就是陪伴的力量——它不会改变你的人生，但会在你快撑不下去的时候，给你一点力量。
This is the power of companionship - it will not change your life, but it will give you some strength when you can't hold on anymore.
小丽还学会了陪伴自己。
Xiaoli also learned to accompany herself.
以前她害怕一个人吃饭，一个人旅行，一个人过节，觉得孤独是一种失败。
In the past, she was afraid of eating alone, traveling alone, and celebrating holidays alone, and she felt that loneliness was a failure.
但后来她慢慢发现，一个人也可以很好。
But later she slowly discovered that it was possible to be good alone.
她学会了一个人去看展览，一个人煮一顿热腾腾的饭，一个人走在冬天的街道上，
She learned to go to exhibitions alone, cook a hot meal alone, and walk on the winter streets alone.
听歌、看灯、闻雪的味道。
Listen to music, watch the lights, and smell the snow.
她说：“我终于明白，爱不仅是别人给我的温暖，也可以是我自己给自己的陪伴。
She said: “I finally understand that love is not only the warmth given to me by others, but also the companionship I give to myself.
”Self-companionship is the beginning of self-love.（学会陪伴自己，
"Self-companionship is the beginning of self-love.
是自爱的开始。
It’s the beginning of self-love.
"） 我们常常把“陪伴”看得太轻，以为它只是日常、只是理所当然。
） We often take ""accompany"" too lightly, thinking it is just a daily routine and just taken for granted.
"可其实，能长期陪伴我们的人，都值得我们感恩。
But in fact, those who can accompany us for a long time are worthy of our gratitude.
不论是血缘、友情、还是爱情，最终都要回归到一种稳定、安静、彼此尊重的存在。
Whether it is blood relationship, friendship, or love, it will eventually return to a stable, quiet, and mutually respectful existence.
一个愿意每天都和你说早安的人，一个愿意为你留饭的人，
Someone who is willing to say good morning to you every day, someone who is willing to save food for you,
一个在你生病时会发消息问“吃药了吗？
One that will send you a message when you are sick and ask “Have you taken your medicine?
”的人——这些平凡的瞬间，才是我们活着最真实的幸福来源。
"These ordinary moments are the real source of happiness in our lives.
所以，小丽现在常常对她的学生说：“你们将来可能会经历很多风风雨雨，
So, Xiaoli often tells her students now: “You may experience many ups and downs in the future.
会遇到很多喜欢的人、爱的人，也会有失去的人。
You will meet many people you like and love, and you will also lose people.
但请你们记得，无论什么时候，都要珍惜那个在你需要时没有转身离开的人。
But please remember, no matter when, you should cherish the person who does not turn away when you need him.
因为在这个世界上，最温柔的爱，是愿意陪你的人。
Because in this world, the most gentle love is someone who is willing to accompany you.
"” 她也在日记本上写下这样一句话：“真正的爱，不是要彼此成为对方生命的全部，
” She also wrote this sentence in her diary: “True love is not about becoming the whole life of each other.
"而是即使各自独立，也愿意走在一起。
But even if they are independent, they are willing to walk together.
”这句话，是她多年对爱的理解和感悟的总结。
"This sentence is a summary of her understanding and perception of love over the years.
不是依赖，不是控制，而是尊重、是陪伴、是在人生路上并肩同行。
It’s not about dependence, it’s not about control, it’s about respect, it’s about companionship, it’s about walking side by side on the journey of life.
如果你正在经历孤独，也许你要做的，不是拼命寻找别人，而是先学会好好地陪伴自己；
If you are experiencing loneliness, maybe what you need to do is not to desperately look for others, but to learn to accompany yourself well first;
如果你已经拥有了某种形式的爱，请记得，多一点耐心、多一点理解，因为真正的陪伴，
If you already have some form of love, please remember to be more patient and understanding, because true companionship is
是长久的在乎，是愿意看见对方的不完美，也依然不离不弃的决心。
It is long-term care, the willingness to see the other person's imperfections, and the determination to never give up.
爱，从来不只是一种情绪，它更是一种选择——选择留下，选择靠近，选择陪伴。
Love is never just an emotion, it is also a choice - choose to stay, choose to be close, choose to accompany.
而所有这些选择，最终都组成了我们最温暖、最真实的人生。
And all these choices ultimately make up our warmest and most real life.
如果你问小丽，经历了这么多，她最终学到了什么，
If you ask Xiaoli what she finally learned after going through so much,
她可能会笑着回答：“我学会了慢慢去爱，也学会了好好告别。
She might answer with a smile: "I learned to love slowly and to say goodbye properly.
”我们总以为，爱是开始，是拥抱，是在一起，但其实，爱更是一种能力，
"We always think that love is a beginning, a hug, and being together, but in fact, love is more of a skill.
是一种在拥有时真诚付出，在失去时温柔放下的成熟。
It is a kind of maturity that allows you to give sincerely when you have something and let go gently when you lose something.
当我们年少的时候，总以为爱是要抓住，是要拥有，是你就是我的、我是你的。
When we were young, we always thought that love was to be grasped and possessed, that you were mine and I was yours.
但后来我们才懂，有些人注定只能陪我们走一段路，而我们唯一能做的，
But later we understood that some people are destined to only accompany us for a part of the journey, and the only thing we can do is
就是感谢这一段相遇，不后悔，不纠缠。
Just be grateful for this encounter, no regrets, no entanglement.
小丽曾写下这样一句话：“爱，是让我在黑夜中不再害怕独行的光。
Xiaoli once wrote: "Love is the light that makes me no longer afraid to walk alone in the dark.
”她说，这光不一定是某一个具体的人，它可能是一次经历，是一句话，是一段回忆，
"She said that this light is not necessarily a specific person, it may be an experience, a sentence, or a memory.
也可能是你自己心中点亮的那一盏灯。
It may also be the light that is lit in your own heart.
她曾经在夜深人静的时候回想起某个夏天，那个和她一起淋雨走回宿舍的男孩，
She once recalled in the dead of night the boy who walked back to the dormitory with her in the rain on a certain summer day.
那个曾经在她最伤心时抱紧她的朋友，那些人，也许早已不再出现在她的生活中，
The friend who once hugged her when she was most sad, those people, may no longer appear in her life.
但他们留下的情感和善意，却在她生命里发了光。
But the affection and kindness they left behind shone in her life.
爱就是这样，它不总是拥有明确的归属，也不总是需要明确的结果。
Love is like this, it does not always have a clear belonging, nor does it always require a clear result.
有时候，它只是悄悄改变了你，让你变得更温柔，更坚强，也更明白如何去对待这个世界。
Sometimes, it just changes you quietly, making you gentler, stronger, and more aware of how to treat the world.
It’s not who you end up with,
It’s not who you end up with,
it’s who changed you along the way.（重要的不是最后谁陪你到老，
It’s who changed you along the way.
而是在这一路上，谁曾深深地影响过你。
But it’s about who has deeply influenced you along the way.
）每一次真心的付出，哪怕没有回报，也都是你成为更好自己的证明。
) Every sincere effort you make, even if there is no reward, is proof that you are becoming a better version of yourself.
在一次公开课中，小丽对她的学生说：“如果你爱一个人，请不要只想着结果，
In an open class, Xiaoli said to her students: "If you love someone, please don't just think about the result.
而要珍惜每一次和他相处的过程。
Instead, cherish every moment you spend with him.
也许有一天你们不能继续走下去，但只要你们曾认真看过彼此的眼睛、认真说过每一句话，
Maybe one day you can't go on, but as long as you have looked into each other's eyes and said every word seriously,
那这份爱就是真实的、有意义的。
Then this love is real and meaningful.
”她希望这些孩子不要像她曾经那样，把所有的期待都绑在一个人身上，而是学会，
She hopes that these children will not put all their expectations on one person like she did, but learn to
在爱里保持清醒和温柔，在付出中也保留尊严与独立。
Stay sober and gentle in love, and maintain dignity and independence in giving.
她说，最好的关系是这样的：我们彼此喜欢，但不强求；我们彼此靠近，但不依赖；
She said that the best relationship is this: we like each other but don't force it; we are close to each other but don't depend on each other;
我们愿意为了对方变得更好，但不是为了讨好对方而失去自己。
We are willing to become better for each other, but not to lose ourselves in order to please each other.
这样的爱，才会让人自由，让人坚定，也让人勇敢。
This kind of love can make people free, firm and brave.
真正的爱，不是你在我身边我才快乐，而是因为有了你，我学会了更好地独处，
True love is not that I am happy only when you are by my side, but that because of you, I learn to be alone better.
也更懂得如何去爱别人。
And I know better how to love others.
有一次她看了一部纪录片，
Once she watched a documentary.
里面有一句话让她印象特别深：“人不是为了找到另一个人而存在的，
There was a sentence in it that left a deep impression on her: "People do not exist to find another person,
而是为了成为一个完整的人，然后遇见另一个也完整的人。
It's about becoming a complete person and then meeting another complete person.
”她反复默念这句话，觉得那就是她这些年走过来的总结。
She repeated this sentence silently over and over again, thinking that it was the summary of her life over the years.
我们追求的，不是依附式的爱情，而是两个独立的灵魂，在同一个方向上携手前行。
What we pursue is not dependent love, but two independent souls moving hand in hand in the same direction.
这一路走来，小丽从一个充满幻想的小女孩，变成了一个懂得平衡的女人。
Along the way, Xiaoli has transformed from a little girl full of fantasies into a woman who knows how to strike a balance.
她不再期待所谓的“灵魂伴侣”可以读懂她的每个眼神，
She no longer expects the so-called "soul mate" to understand her every look.
而是愿意花时间沟通、倾听、表达。
Instead, be willing to spend time communicating, listening and expressing.
她也不再害怕孤单，因为她知道，孤单是每个人的功课，
She is no longer afraid of loneliness, because she knows that loneliness is everyone's lesson.
而爱是我们在这个过程中找到的礼物。
And love is the gift we find in this process.
有时候爱是一束光，有时候爱是一杯热茶，
Sometimes love is a beam of light, sometimes love is a cup of hot tea,
有时候爱是一句简单却及时的话：“你不必坚强到让人看不出你在难过。
Sometimes love is a simple but timely statement: “You don’t have to be strong enough for people not to see that you’re sad.
"” 她越来越相信，人生的意义并不在于你收获了多少爱，而在于你在爱中学到了什么。
” She increasingly believes that the meaning of life does not lie in how much love you receive, but in what you learn from love.
"你是否学会了耐心？
Have you learned patience?
是否变得更有包容力？
Is it becoming more inclusive?
是否在伤痛后依然选择相信？
Do you still choose to believe after the pain?
这才是爱留给我们的宝贵财富。
This is the precious treasure that love leaves us.
她也曾失败，也曾跌倒，也曾在黑夜里一个人哭得喘不过气，
She had failed, fallen, and cried alone in the dark night until she couldn't catch her breath.
但她从来没有停止相信——爱值得，值得我们一次又一次地去尝试，去靠近，
But she never stopped believing that love is worth it, worth trying again and again, and getting closer.
去点亮别人的世界，也照亮自己。
To light up other people's world and also to light up your own.
最后她写给未来的自己的那段话是这样的：“愿你在未来的日子里，不因孤独而将就，
The last words she wrote to her future self were: "I hope you will not give in to loneliness in the days ahead.
不因伤害而封闭，不因恐惧而退缩。
Don't close yourself off because of hurt, and don't retreat because of fear.
愿你依然相信爱，愿你成为爱。
May you still believe in love, may you be love.
”这段话，她读了很多次，每一次读完，心里都更加坚定。
She read this passage many times, and each time she finished reading it, she became more determined.
她知道，爱不是一个名词，而是一个动词，它需要被实践，被选择，被活出来。
She knew that love is not a noun but a verb. It needs to be practiced, chosen and lived out.
所以亲爱的你，如果你现在还没有遇到那个让你怦然心动的人，不要焦虑；
So dear, if you haven't met the person who makes your heart beat fast yet, don't be anxious;
如果你正在经历一段动荡的感情，也请别灰心；如果你已经拥有了一份稳定的陪伴，
If you are experiencing a turbulent relationship, please don't be discouraged; if you already have a stable companion,
那就好好珍惜。
Then cherish it.
请你相信，无论你在哪个阶段，爱都在以你看得见或看不见的方式悄悄靠近你。
Please believe that no matter what stage you are in, love is quietly approaching you in ways that you can see or not.
你所做的一切努力，都不会白费；你曾流过的泪，曾付出的心意，
All your efforts will not be in vain; the tears you have shed and the love you have given will not be in vain.
都会在未来的某一天以另一种形式回到你身边。
They will come back to you in another form one day in the future.
因为真正的爱，不会消失，它只是会变成你眼神里的光，语言里的温度，行为里的温柔。
Because true love will never disappear, it will just become the light in your eyes, the warmth in your words, and the tenderness in your actions.
它是你身上的一种气质，一种让别人觉得安心的力量。
It is a kind of temperament in you, a power that makes others feel at ease.
而当你成为那样的人，你就已经是爱本身。
And when you become that person, you are already love itself.
✍️ Vocabulary & Examples - 词汇和例子
Let's learn a few useful and meaningful phrases from today's podcast!
计划
Meaning: plan
Explanation: A noun or verb that means to make a plan or have a schedule. In the dialogue, it is used when A asks B if they have any plans for the weekend.
Example from the text: 这个周末你有什么计划吗？
搬家
Meaning: to move (house)
Explanation: A verb phrase meaning to move to a new home. In the conversation, A says their friend just moved into a new place.
Example from the text: 他刚搬了新家。
随便
Meaning: casual, informal
Explanation: This word expresses something relaxed or not formal. The phrase “随便去坐坐” means to drop by casually without formality.
Example from the text: 只是随便去坐坐。
期待
Meaning: to look forward to
Explanation: A verb that shows anticipation or excitement about something that is going to happen. In the dialogue, B expresses excitement about the upcoming visit.
Example from the text: 我很期待。
零食
Meaning: snacks
Explanation: Refers to small snack foods like candies, nuts, or dried fruit. A suggests bringing some snacks or fruit when visiting a friend’s home.
Example from the text: 可以带点水果或者零食。
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